I’m Gonna Be (500 miles) is honestly just such a pure, solid good song. The lyrics are cute af and actually resemble a long-term committed and happy relationship and to top it all off you can scream ‘DAHDADADA’ and the top of your lungs in a pub and someone will scream it back to you.
Tfw you suddenly see an awesome acquaintance for the first time in quite awhile and they kiss your hand
executive dysfunction is telling yourself for two and a half hours that you need to shower bc you smell like your workplace and you absolutely Cannot do Anything Else until you shower, doing Any Other Thing before showering is illegal!!! but you still haven’t for some reason??? you’ve just been sitting on your bed in a towel scrolling tumblr for 2+ hours thinking “I need to shower right now immediately” and growing increasingly frustrated that you are still not clean and you haven’t eaten or done your laundry either
ok actually no I’m reblogging this because a) I am clean now (and I smell amazing, thank you), and b) I had a heckin Realize and I wanted to share it with y’all in the hopes it’ll help someone else with a brain like mine.
I figured something out about myself a long time ago– it’s only just now occurred to me that I was in fact solving a problem caused by executive dysfunction, and I haven’t been implementing this solution lately because my brain went “that’s a relatively new term to me and therefore a Different problem that requires a Different solution”. thanks a lot, brain.
anyway, long long ago, before I knew these fancy schmancy Official words, the problem, as I phrased it to myself, was such:
sometimes I get Stuck. I was doing something, or on my way to doing something, and then… I just. got stuck.
“Stuck” looks like refreshing my feed or dashboard repeatedly. or it looks like staring at a spot on the wall. or chewing my fingernails. or picking at a stubborn sticker. all the while, my brain drifts through various unrelated topics I wouldn’t be able to recall if asked. sometimes I can get Stuck for hours before realizing I am Stuck. sometimes I get so Stuck that I go to bed that way (feeling especially bad for being unproductive) and I have to just reset everything by sleeping.
one day I asked myself, “why is this happening? why am I stuck, right now, at this moment in time?” the answer, as it turns out, was pretty simple: I was trying to make a decision, and I got distracted. I haven’t moved forward because I haven’t answered that one question or made up my mind.
let me rephrase this in terms of executive dysfunction: many people have expressed that it feels like knowing you need to do a thing but not feeling “ready” to do it. many with ADHD may also be familiar with the feeling of needing things to be “just so” before you embark on a task- you need your setup to look a certain way, or you need to set a timer, or have the right music playing, etc.
when I get Stuck it’s often because I got lost somewhere in that setting-up process, and my brain took the opportunity to nyoom off into Distraction Town.
getting myself Unstuck is solved, 95% of the time, by tracing my steps back to the original decision I was trying to make- often something small and inane- and then troubleshooting from there. (out loud! verbal processing is totally punk.)
“what was I trying to do?”
“was I trying to decide between two things?”
(the answer’s usually yes.)
“what were they?”
“okay, let’s decide.
“okay, that’s settled. let’s move on.”
and then I am free as a bird to nyoom in the direction of The Thing I Wanted To Do All Along, in the amazingly disorganized, scattered, yet rapid-fire way that I do many things.
so!!! in the case of my first post, where I hadn’t showered for 2 hours? turns out I had been trying to decide what music to listen to in the shower. (another hack: my chances of getting Stuck while showering decrease by 75% if I have music playing to help me keep track of time.) I couldn’t immediately make up my mind, got lost in thought, got distracted, and drifted. once I stopped and asked- “why am I stuck?”- then I remembered- “oh yeah! I wanted to listen to music”- and then decided- “I want to listen to Daft Punk’s Discovery album”- I was finally heckin able to shower. and also eat, and also throw my clothes in the dryer.
and may I add I only zoned out once, during the slow part of “One More Time.” 😛
I’m not saying this is a foolproof method. sometimes I don’t have a reason for being stuck, and that’s okay! I’m also not saying this is how every adhd brain works. it’s just how my brain works, and I’m sure there’s at least a few who can relate. for those few, I hope this helps!!
a lot of people are reblogging the original post without the update and leaving frustrated comments and that makes me sad! if I can find ways to hack my brain than so can you! executive dysfunction is a real and frustrating challenge, but don’t buy the lie that there’s no way to work with it or around it!!!
*some vegan rando who has never owned a cat before:* don’t put your cats outside! Having an outdoor cat is animal cruelty! Cats are not meant to live outside, why don’t dogs live outside?? If your cat lives outdoors then you are a horrible cat owner!!
*me*: okay…. Anyways… u ever thought about actually caring for an outdoor cat? Try again
You guys seeing this?
Hello @sonik-the-hedgehog, I’m a member of the community on Tumblr known as “vulture culture.” While some members of our little flock are vegan, largely we aren’t, and it makes sense that we aren’t, because you see, ‘Vulture Culture” is dedicated to the preservation, cleaning and crafting with animal remains. Most notably, bones, pelts, claws and teeth.
Do you know what happens to a lot of free roaming feral or outdoor cats? They come to us. They come to us as corpses.
It’s a pretty common theme in the vulture culture community, to the point where some of our informative posts have such features as “How to find out if the dead cat you found has an owner” or “how long you should wait before giving up and processing the corpse to collect the skull” or the legalities of buying, selling, or crafting with the skulls or pelts of salvaged dead cats. A good portion of us vultures have cat skulls on our shelves. And the vast, overwhelming majority of those cat skulls has been picked up by the road.
Not from a cat that’s died peacefully of old age, but from a cat that crossed the road at the wrong time, or a cat that came up on the wrong side of a larger predator, or a cat that died of exposure to the elements, or a cat that succumbed to a lingering disease.
You see, when you allow your cat to live like a wild animal, you’re also opening the door for your cat to DIE like a wild animal, and wild animals don’t have warm safe beds or bandages or pain killers. Wild animals struggle for days or even weeks on a bloody stump of an injured limb. Wild animals hide under porches and die alone where nobody finds them until they begin to smell. Even more wild animals simply disappear, and are absorbed by the landscape until there’s not a single little shred of evidence they ever even existed.
I’ve found such a cat myself! It’s dessicated skin and bleached bones sat, rather tellingly, right outside of an old fox den. Now, it’s impossible to say if the foxes killed the cat, or only scavenged it already dead, or if the cat was merely injured and tired and took shelter in the fox den of its own accord. But it was also impossible to tell whose cat it was, if it had a family or anyone that loved it. Even if it were male or female. It’s identity was erased and anyone who ever had any hope of finding it again will never, ever see it again. It’s sleeping in the fox den to this very day.
Maybe when it’s rotted down a bit more I’ll go look for it again. I’ll pick it up in a little bag and take it home and clean it up with peroxide and hot water. When it’s clean maybe I’ll give it a nickname like “Sam” or “Macavity” and I’ll put it on my shelf. I’ll take care of the kitty for years to come, like its former owner couldn’t. I’ll keep it clean and warm and safe on a shelf, like it wasn’t kept while it lived. And kitty will be an indoor kitty far too late for it to ever matter.
Your outdoor cats come to us eventually, and we’ll gladly take care of them forever.
Unpopular opinion: If you have an outdoor cat, you need to be prepared to be a responsible outdoor cat owner. This means making sure your yard is escape-proof for your cat, or getting a harness and leash for them. This means fixing your cat. Otherwise, your cat will lead a lower quality, shorter life, and will likely also have a very negative impact on your local ecology, while making more feral cats out in the world. Outdoor and feral cats kill literally billions of small birds and animals in America alone each year. This isn’t their fault, they have hunting instincts. And feral cats need to eat. But that is yet another reason why humans NEED to be responsible cat owners.
Cat behavioralist Jackson Galaxy from My Cat From Hell has very good info on how to cat-proof your yard and why this is so important.
what did we do to deserve animal crossing. like how did nintendo know it was always a dream of mine to live in a cute pink house and befriend talking deer and hamsters
fun fact animal crossing was developed with themes of moving from loneliness towards community and building friendships because the creator, katsuya eguchi, felt that same sort of isolation when he moved from chiba to kyoto and realized how much he missed that connection between himself and his friends and family
this is such a good addition i never knew about thank you!
Don’t try that mascara/arm hair shit. I’ve been passing for more than a year with short, blond arm hair. It’s not an important secondary sex characteristic.
Board shorts (without pockets in the front) do wonders to minimize the width of your hips. Always choose board shorts over swim trunks. Choose them over cargo shorts if it’s appropriate.
Speak from your chest, never from your head.
The goal of binding should not be an entirely flat chest; you should bind for your body type.
GC2b makes the best binders out there, and their products are designed specifically for trans men/transmasculine people.
It might seem useless if you’re pre-T, but working out can be a big help for dysphoria.
Eyebrows are really important to passing pre-testosterone. Muss that shit up. Make them look unkempt.
When you ask for a haircut, make sure the edges in the back are squared, not rounded.
If you have peach fuzz, I would advise shaving it. Cis guys shed theirs when they go through puberty. Shaving can also help with facial hair dysphoria.
Don’t ever buy a binder from Amazon. They run in strange sizes (I was an XXL even though I’m a M in GC2b) and take weeks/months to come. It’s also difficult to breathe in them after a few hours.
-Patience is a virtue you need to come to terms with. Even on T, things take time. My voice dropped immediately, but my cycle continued for 6 months. We’re all different.
-In the summer, HYDRATE YOURSELF. A binder is an extra layer, and mine have always been very warm.
-When its not too hot, layers are your friend. You’d be surprised what even simply an undershirt can do to smooth out your look.
-You are going to get misgendered. This is a fact, and it sucks. Learn to politely correct people. Remember you might be the first (openly) trans person they meet, so be a good ambassador.
-When you start T, your smell will change. You will sweat like you’ve never sweat before, and it WILL STINK. Adjust your bathing habits accordingly.
*coughs in direction of my trans friendos*
If you have a really large chest you might do better with Underworks binders. They aren’t pretty, they’re not soft, but they do a good job and were the first on the market for a very long time. I couldn’t stand gc2b so if you’re like me, try Underworks.
Don’t double bind.
DON’T USE DUCK TAPE. I still have scars from a dumb decision I made as a teen and I’m 31 now.
When the time comes for top surgery, shop around. Find someone who will tailor your chest to your needs. Look at their portfolio. Compare surgeons. See if you can find someone who will work with your health insurance if you have it.
Be safe. Be healthy. Take your time. It’s not a race or a competition.
*incoherent screaming* MY TRANS MEN/ TRANS MASCULINE FOLLOWERS, L O O K👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
Disheveled Mess 